So, I guess I was one or two when they got divorced, and there was a lot of drugs and alcohol involved in that early scene. My father eventually died of alcoholism in my arms years later. You know, at that time it was just too much for my mother to be around, so that was sort of my very first taste of that type of environment.
My name is Holt Haynesworth. I’m a new father. I have a brand-new daughter who’s two months old now, Chloe, with my wife Megan Haynesworth. Learning to make good decisions about things and intelligent decisions, whether or not you’re on the spectrum of smart or not so smart, you have to practice making decisions. And, you have to be encouraged when you do something right, say “Hey you made the right choice.” My stepfather was very controlling versus John, my father; John would allow me to figure this stuff out on my own. Where my stepfather, even when he was helping would want to think for me, and then force the answer on me for me to accept it. He was very smart, and it was very much the right answer, but the difference was I was not challenged to think, and make these decisions, and practice making decisions in that kind of environment.
You don’t want your kids… I don’t think anybody would want their kids to be hurt, and it’s hard to sit back on the sideline and actually watch someone make the wrong decision. I don’t think you should stand on the sideline and watch your kids mess up constantly, but to actually allow them to make a decision, allow them to make a mistake, and then come in and talk to them about it. Say “Hey, what do you think happened? Why do you think it didn’t work out the way you wanted it to? What would you do better next time?” Challenge them to think about these things, and not be afraid of making mistakes, because usually you get afraid of someone criticizing you. Make them so they’re fearless about attacking life, and be OK with making mistakes, and welcome them to try to learn from those things so the mistakes become less and less and less.
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